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Articles from
December 2005
Hobbies for Gifted Children
Home was such a fun place to be when I was growing up. There was always something to do. My parents encouraged every interest any of us had. My older brother was interested in the weather, building models, HO gauge trains, beekeeping, and sailing.
Rich kept a small ringed notebook and every day he cut the weather map out of the paper and pasted it in. Using the thermometers and barometers in the house, he recorded the high and low temperatures and the air pressure. He made his own predictions of the short and long-term forecasts and also noted whether he had been correct on the previous day.
Model airplanes that Rich built hung from the ceiling in his bedroom and the dresser was covered with ships he had assembled.
While in elementary school, he saved his money from his paper route to start buying HO gauge trains. In the basement he created a setup of plywood that rested on wooded horses. On this platform rested the layout that he created. He built every house, created every tree and road, and constructed every bridge on that layout.
When he was in junior high school, Rich started beekeeping and eventually had four hives. He would harvest the honey and sell it to friends and family. He had an arrangement with the school principal to let him out of school whenever a swarm left a hive so he could retrieve it.
Rich first experimented with sailing by fastening a rig on an old aluminum rowboat. In junior high, he took over the family’s one-car garage and built a two-man Sunfish from scratch.
We all had collections of rocks, shells, and butterflies. I learned how to sew, knit, and crochet. Everyone learned how to play at least one instrument. We had hobbies that required a financial investment, but we also had many hobbies that didn’t cost a cent.
At times, parents come to me and say that their child is very bored in school. One of the first things I ask is what the child likes to do at home. Occasionally, a parent will reply that this is a big problem because the child isn’t interested in anything. When I hear this answer, I worry. I’m not sure how to help a child who is interested in nothing. If, however, the parent starts rattling off all kinds of interests that the child has at home, I have great hope that we can work with these interests to change the way things work at school. I strongly encourage all parents to expose their kids to a wide variety of interests and hobby possibilities.
According to the Merriam-Webster Unabridged Dictionary, a hobby is a "specialized pursuit (as stamp collecting, painting, woodworking, gardening) that is outside one's regular occupation and that one finds particularly interesting and enjoys doing usually in a nonprofessional way as a source of leisure-time relaxation; broadly: any favorite pursuit or interest." While hobbies benefit all kids, gifted children can gain enormously from them. Hobbies broaden the interests of children, inspire new ways of thinking, release stress, and enhance competence. They also encourage tenacity, organization, and creative thinking.
The first place to start, of course, is for parents to have interests and hobbies of their own. Just don’t expect your children to have the same interests. Respect their desire to try new things. Support them as they explore different areas.
As always, the Internet is full of support and ideas. The following may be helpful:
Homeschooling Gifted Children
There are a number of reasons why parents of bright students choose to homeschool their children.
- Their children are very smart and it is difficult for their needs to be met in the public school system.
- The family is traveling extensively and traditional school is impossible.
- At least one of the children has a very special talent, often outside of the realm of the traditional school curriculum. This talent may be in music or acting or art or a specific area of science. Whatever the talent, it requires more time than is possible while attending a traditional school.
Some families decide to homeschool their children for the entire K-12 education. Others may do it for just a few years. Some combine traditional school with homeschooling by enrolling students in only some subjects at their neighborhood school and homeschooling all other subjects. Some combine homeschooling with enrollment in courses in a junior college or in a university. By keeping an open mind, one can come up with many possibilities.
Support for homeschooled families is vital. The good news is that the resources to help are out there. Here are just a few.
This site includes listservs, websites and electronic magazines, bibliographies, and research studies--all on homeschooling gifted children.
You will find a wealth of information here, which is provided by the Homeschool Association of California. It includes reasons for homeschooling your gifted child, how to do actually do it, working with teens, preparing for college, working with gifted children who have learning difficulties, and resources.
At this site you will find a message board, supportive articles, sources for supplies, and suggestions for curriculum.
This book helps families decide if homeschooling will be right for them, ways to approach homeschooling, testing, and resources.
Gifted Education Journals and Magazines
Would you like to learn more about gifted education? One way to do this is to subscribe to a journal or magazine in the field. Here are some publications that you may want to consider.
Gifted Child Quarterly is published by the National Association for Gifted Children. This journal publishes original scholarly reviews of literature, research studies, and manuscripts that explore policy.
Gifted Child Today, a magazine for educators and parents, is published four times a year. It offers information about teaching and parenting gifted and talented children, including lesson ideas, program suggestions, new product announcements, and more.
Gifted Education Communicator is published by the California Association for the Gifted. This practitioner’s journal is issued four times each year. The primary target audiences are parents and educators of K-12 gifted children.
Imagine is for middle and high school students who want to take control of their learning and get the most out of their precollege years. Published five times a year, Imagine provides insights, information, and solid counseling to young, motivated readers.
Journal for the Education of the Gifted, a quarterly journal, is the official publication of The Association for the Gifted. It offers information and research on the educational and psychological needs of gifted and talented children.
Journal of Secondary Gifted Education is a quarterly journal that offers education professionals information needed for building effective programs for gifted adolescents and young adults. Articles address the unique issues related to gifted education during the middle school, high school, and undergraduate years.
Parenting for High Potential is a quarterly magazine designed for parents who want to develop their children’s gifts and talents. Roeper Review (no website available)
41190 Woodward Avenue
Bloomfield Hills MI 48304
248-203-7321
This resource is published four times a year and is for professionals who work with teachers and psychologists, and for professionals who work directly with gifted and talented children and their families.
Understanding Our Gifted is published four times a year and is filled with practical advice, social and emotional concerns, strategies to use at home and school, and educational options. It is written for parents, educators, and counselors.
Holiday Gifts for Gifted Children
This holiday season, adults are scrambling to find presents for gifted children that will be fun, help them to grow intellectually, and have lasting value. If chosen appropriately, board games, card games, construction toys, books, puzzles, and computer software, will serve these needs in a most satisfying way. When looking for gifts to give at the holiday season or any time, look for items that
- require higher level thinking and reasoning
- encourage creative thinking
- teach new facts or ideas
- can be used over and over again
Quality toys and activities usually require seeing patterns, making plans, searching combinations, judging alternative moves, and learning from experience.
Sometimes it is difficult for parents to find good sources for these great educational materials. Here are a couple of organizations for the parents of gifted children that have compiled links to many worthwhile sources.
The Smart Toys for Gifted Kids section on Hoagies’ website, where you will find numerous sources for classic wooden puzzles, toys, and board games for the family.
The Davidson Institute section on games. Scroll down the page almost halfway until you get to the section on catalogues.
Remember that your children--no matter what their ages--will enjoy your active role in playing with them and solving puzzles together. Much of the learning experience comes from discussing the various possible strategies used--what works, what doesn’t work, and why.
Perfectionism and the Gifted Child
If I were to have an operation, I would want a surgeon whose skills were perfect. As a passenger on an airplane, I want to have a pilot who knows exactly what to do in any situation. We look for people at our workplace to be not only bright, but dedicated, with attention to detail. We applaud the student who studies hard, does excellent work, and is never a behavior problem.
One would think, then, that trying to be perfect is a highly desirable trait. Unfortunately, perfectionism can also have its downsides--especially for gifted students.
When my youngest son, Todd, was only three, he wanted to learn how to make his bed. I taught him and he did a good job. However, if he couldn’t make it without a wrinkle, he would be very upset with himself. He had a habit of taking his open hand and slowly moving it down his face, over and over again. He thought that if he kept making that movement, he would keep the tears from welling up in his eyes. When Todd played his simple pieces on the piano, it was important to him to play them perfectly. If he made a mistake, his hand again would slowly start moving down his face. It was very upsetting to me to see him so stressed out. Finally, when he was about eight, this need for perfectionism started to turn. I would walk past his room and see that everything wasn’t put away just right. While many mothers might call the child to the room and ask him to straighten it up, I was secretly doing a little dance in my head. When Todd chose a college, he rejected the possibility of a four-year fully paid music scholarship at one school to go to a more difficult school. A couple of months into his freshman year I asked him how it was going. He replied, “Mom, I’m the worst pianist here.” My heart sank as I said, “That must feel terrible.” His voice took on an enthusiastic tone as he boasted, “No. Not at all. It gives me something to work towards.” Over the years, he had learned to change from a perfectionist to a person who strives for excellence. In other words, he set high goals and worked towards them, but didn’t get upset if he didn’t do as well as he hoped. He became realistic in his objectives.
Many young people who are perfectionists are consumed by fears, especially fears of social or academic failure. These children perceive themselves as failures, feeling they have not met either their own expectations (which are often unrealistic) or the expectations of others. They may feel that respect and love from others is conditional upon their performance. Every situation is “all or nothing,” “black or white.” People must and can do their best at all times. Since there is little value in doing things they cannot do well, this perfectionism may turn into a paralyzing situation where they don’t even try.
When external pressures (either real or perceived) are exerted upon some children, results can be even more acute. These external pressures may include due dates, reward systems, and expectations for certain grades. While these pressures work to the advantage of many students, they may cause problems for students who are extremely sensitive.
Strategies to Help Perfectionists
- Discuss perfectionism--its symptoms, causes and misconceptions.
- Share stories that show that mistakes can be used as learning tools. (Look at any book about inventors and you will find stories of people who failed many times for every success they experienced.)
- Help students determine the areas of their lives that they can control and those that are controlled by others and by chance.
- Incorporate goal setting and student evaluation into major facets of learning.
- Help students to self-evaluate, drawing attention to their strengths and accomplishments, and to reinforce progress they make toward goals.
- Be a good role model. Demonstrate that learning is a process of trial and error. Stay with problems for a reasonable amount of time, even if the problems are difficult. Admit all mistakes as an adult. Model imperfect behavior, personal evaluation, goal setting, reasonable risk taking, self acceptance of your own imperfections and "off" days, and good listening and responding skills.
- Encourage and expect children to try new things.
- Help your young person look for realistic standards.
- If a child perceives that she has failed at something, wait until after the emotional tension is reduced before discussing the matter. This may help avoid defensive behaviors. Don't expect rational or logical thinking during the immediate stress period following defeat.
- Teach admiration as a strategy for handling jealously. Notice, admire, and communicate admiration to others. Acknowledge a family member when he treats another in a positive manner. When playing games together, voice appreciation for the skill used in a particular move rather than being upset that the person is beating you.
Resources
There are some excellent books available on perfectionism, including
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